Treasured interruption

Laying in bed trying to go to sleep - bump bump kick... No it's not Chris, it's Little Peep!  I am especially savoring this interruption tonight.  I really just started feeling Little Peep move on a regular basis this last week (18 weeks), so feeling her roll around is still a new thrill.  So that's one reason to savor the moment.  I also love feeling my tiny ones move because it is reassuring to me that all is well.  Finally, we have had several close friends and family members lose their tiny ones early in pregnancy the last few months - these loses have been heavy on my heart and a reminder that it is only God's grace, not any might or merit of my own, that sustains this new life I get to carry.  I can't think of a better reason to be kept awake than an active tiny person rolling around in my belly!

Lies I Believe

We all believe lies, some have more impact than others, some we know are lies, some we don't recognize, but that doesn't make them any less damaging.  Sometimes the ones we don't recognize are the worst.  They disguise themselves as noble and good, or necessary even, they are able to entrench themselves so deeply in our psyche to go against them seems like a betrayal of our self.

What do you do when one of these lies is revealed to you? Do you try to pretend like you don't see it because change is too hard?  Do you make another lie to excuse the first? Or do you tackle it head on?  I like to think I would face it head on but that can be a lot harder than it sounds, especially with well constructed lies that have wormed their way into daily life - like the one I just discovered.

"I'll do it (play with kiddos, bible study, read that awesome book, exercise, blog, sew, call/email friends, cook freezer meals, make homemade health care products, etc.) as soon as I'm caught up."

Doesn't seem like much does it? But it has undermined so much in my daily life! It has pulled me from my kids and from time I could be investing in their lives, it has taken my eyes off the Lord and focused them on futility, it has generated unnecessary stress and guilt over what has been done and what was neglected in the process.  Even when I do take time to play with my kiddos, the pressure of unfinished tasks distracts me from fully enjoying and focusing on them.  The to-do list keeps me from doing things that in my mind are high priorities, but don't come out in my actions.

The truth is the ever present to-do list will never be finished.  There will always be dishes, laundry and sticky floors.  There will always be a project needing done in the house or yard.  It is held out in front of many Moms as a dangling carrot of distraction by Satan.  A promise that doing these things, presenting a good front, will make others like me more, will fulfill me, will make me a better Mom.  

The truth is my babies are only this age for a fleeting moment.  Eb will only ask me to play with him so many times in his life.  Evie will only want 'up' a little while longer.  I will only be able to rock and sing them to sleep for a few precious years.

So I declare this lie, and I am going to do my best to renounce it every day it rears it's deceptive little head by acting on my priorities.  By playing with the babies first, by exercising before vacuuming, by putting people before projects and y putting the Lord above all.